This is a guest post from our friend, Jarkko Laine. Jarkko is Insanely Interested In Everything, and single-handedly starting an entrepreneurial revolution.
When I think of a billionaire the first image that comes to mind is that of Scrooge McDuck. An image of someone who has earned a big fortune through hard work, but lost the most important treasures along the way: his friends, family, and good will.
Traditionally this is what business has been about. After all, check out Donald Trumps long string of ex-wives (at least he didn’t chop off their heads like Henry VIII). I challenge you to count the successful entrepreneurs who have been able to maintain a healthy work-life balance. And it’s not only entrepreneurs who are affected. Pretty much everyone who wishes to climb the corporate ladder needs to submit to deadly working hours and enough stress to turn the once friendly bloke into a zombie robot.
But this is about to change. There is a small revolution on the way.
What inspired me to write this post was an e-mail message I received from Shane a few days ago. In that email, he said something that I haven’t been able to get off my mind. It’s a simple, but yet so profound thought: “I can take other people with me”.
What a testimony of a new way of looking at the business world!
It’s a testimony of a new world order in which business is not only about money, but about doing what you love, with the people you love. About a new world in which business means doing something good to the community, and feeling good about yourself. And a world in which you can surf every day - even if you aren’t Kelly Slater (apparently he’s the most successful
professional surfer in the history of surfing - thanks, Wikipedia).
In this new world, there are four things that you should keep with you on your way to the top: Your family, your friends, the world around you, and most importantly, yourself.
Bring your family with you.
To your kids, you are one of the two most important people in the whole world, their mom and dad. Can you say that about your boss or your colleagues? I doubt it.
That’s why leaving your family behind when building your business is the biggest mistake you can make. People at their death beds never wish they had worked more. What they say they wish is that they would have spent more time getting to know their kids and building the relationship with their spouses.
My family is the biggest reason I strive for entrepreneurship: If I am the one in charge of my working hours, I can plan my time and work place so that there is always room for my little son. That’s a focus I never want to lose.
Bring your friends with you.
Shane and Peter, for example, are best friends. There is something overwhelming about that thought. When you work with your best friend, work is much more than just putting eight hours in every day.
When you work with friends, your work and life get mixed together. But not in the traditional “work so much that you forget about your life” kind of way.
That’s what the new way of doing business means to me: treating people well, staying as friends, and making new friends.
(little insert from Shane:) There is a great joy in life in seeing your friends succeed. While personal achievement is incredible gratifying, nothing beats being able to share it. We are going to El Salvador in February for a business retreat. Right now 10 of our closes friends, who we happen to do business with are coming. It would be cool to go alone. Having earned the financial ability together by mutual support, which enables us all to be able to go, makes it that much more precious. After all, when you are rich and free, don’t you want someone to play with?
Bring your world with you.
When you buy in to the idea that entrepreneurship is about more than just money, you begin to see that there are countless opportunities for you to do the right thing.
The right thing can mean many different things: 37 Signals does the right thing by treating their employees well (they only work four days a week during the summer - how cool is that?) and sharing their knowledge and experience with the rest of us for free. Internet entrepreneur Collis Ta’eed does the right thing by organizing the yearly Blog Action Day. MyC4 does the right thing by enabling regular people to invest in African small business.
The ranks of small businesses doing the right thing are even larger: They save on paper. They cut unnecessary business trips. They support fair trade.
This is real power that can change the world.
Bring yourself with you.
But most importantly, bring yourself with you. Don’t let your business transform you into a money eating zombie that works days in days out just mumbling the mantra of “do your work first, have fun later”.
This is your one and only life, and it’s a fragile one.
It’s true that you need to do your work if you want to be successful. But make sure that you’re only doing the things that match your values and support your larger than life goals. Stay focused and work smart instead of just working hard to be appreciated by your boss.
Go surfing every day, if that’s what makes you shine.
Read books.
Spend time with your wife.
And last but not least, work on something you love.
That’s when the new world order starts tipping into reality.
@ Jarkko - Like everything else you’ve ever written, this was fantastic. A joy to read.
@ not Jarkko - subscribe to his feed. Read everything he says. Your life will be better for it.
Thanks for the callout Naomi!
Jarkko, I seem to be seeing this topic a lot lately. The idea that your personal happiness is based upon the environment which you build around you, the people, the pace, the problems and the principles. It makes me wonder though, should it really be do what you love, or love what you do? My father told me once that anything worth doing will include some parts that are uncomfortable, boring or that you have no interest in doing. In fact, he said some of the most rewarding things in his life were 20% do what you love and 80% do what you gotta. I wonder if the do what you love movement will actually turn people into instant gratificationists. Kind of the like high divorce rate. It doesn’t feel right at this moment so I should quit.
I am reading a book on Mastery which talks about understanding that life is a series of plateaus. Mastery is figuring out how to find happiness in the act of practicing with no aparant progress while on the plateau. I haven’t quite digested it yet, but it feels relevent to the idea above.
Anyways, a bit of devils advocacy and some thoughts.
Thanks you so much for the guest post!! It is a good one.
@Naomi: Thanks! And thanks for the opportunity to guest post here at Shane and Peter (This thank you goes equally to both you and Shane, as well as Peter)
@Shane: Now that’s a really important question. Good that you brought it up.
I would have to agree with your dad: everything with great results includes some sweat, tears and dedication (I don’t know if 80/20 are the real figures, but that’s not important). But I think that if you do what you love, it makes it a lot easier for you to commit yourself and stay focused through the hard times.
Your marriage example is a good one: in your marriage you are with the person you love (= doing what you love), but that doesn’t mean that it wouldn’t require work. There might be hard times, but if you quit, you’ll never get to see what they say is the best part: growing old together with the person you love and who knows you better than anyone in the entire world. So, you make a conscious decision saying that this is the person I love. Or in business: this is what I love. This is what I want to do. And then keep working.
I think the same goes with work: you shouldn’t try to love things that are just given to you from above. If you happen to be working at McDonalds, but haven’t really decided that that’s what you want to do, I don’t think there is any reason why you shouldn’t reach for what you believe is the thing you would love to do.
But once you know what you want to do, you’d better make sure you stay committed through the hard times as well as the good ones. Because if you quit in the middle you will never see how that story would have ended.
Great post Jarkko! It was a surprise to find you here, I’ve been a reader of your blog for quite a while, but came on to this blog through a link at Christine’s Self Made Chick blog. Incredibly small this world.
I totally recognize what Shane brings in, but there is a subtle difference between doing what you love and loving what you do. And both can disguise themselves in 80-20 parts.
I just came out of a job where I did not love what I did. And there still was a 20% part of things I loved doing. The problem was that the core part of the job, was in the 80%. The fact that this was a mismatch (or better had grown into one) was when I got a leaflet for a training course. It fit perfectly for the job, and my entire body revolted against the idea of learning more about THAT stuff.
So while there may still be 80% of things you don’t like, they are things to do, but not the essence of the job. I think that’s the main message of the ‘do what you love’ movement.
But like most things, some people take it to extremes and there’s nothing good to be found there.
Now thats an interesting comment Lodewijk (see gotta practice using your name - nice article btw - I need sooo much help with that). The question being one of essence. How do you define that? I was paused for a few minutes to enjoy the full belly feeling of turkey leftovers while pondering you comment.
My conclusion at this moment: the essense is whether or not:
1) you feel like this time is being spent taking you closer to the things you want out of your life. If you believe that what you are doing, even if it is uncomfortably, is part of accomplishing something of importance to you, then it is worth it. Therefor, if you had a list of life goals and you felt your job was bringing you closer to them, then you are doing what you love. After all, if shoveling shit got me everything I could ever have dreamed of in my life, I think I would love shoveling shit.
2) essense is supplemented by environment. I’m still chewing on this, but the people, the purpose, and the layout of a job define much of its essense.
Anyways - this is a pretty good topic to explore and merits more though.
Nicely put Jarkko. The more articles I read on this blog, the more I feel Shane and Peter and their guest writers are on the same wave length I am about entrepreneurship. Just check out the About page on my blog for what I’m trying to do on my blog. I can’t always do it as cohesively and was well written as you all do, but I try! Once I get some funding an can hire people then maybe I can have more time to tie the loose ends of my blog together.
Together we can change the pereceptions of what being an entrepreneur means!
Wow, you really make me think there, Shane! I’ve been staring at this empty commentbox and re-reading your comment for quite some time now. I doubt the thinking will stop soon, but I’m formulating a response anyway…
I know that having a purpose in life and an accompanying list of goals is very powerful. If your job helps you to achieve those, then it’s great. But if you’re trading in hours that suck (the job shoveling shit) for hours that rule (the time not shoveling shit), then I’m not sure where the balance would be. 1 hour of shit for 1 hour of fun? 2:1 or 1:2? I don’t know…
The essence of a job is supplemented by the environment for sure. But if a cook doesn’t like cooking, it will show in both his physique and in his products. A nice team of people in the kitchen might make it bearable, even fun maybe. But there’s something that will keep on nagging.
Now if you did not have any other alternatives, I would say: learn to love it! If there are alternatives, look into those, there’s something you love to do out there.
…if shoveling shit got me everything I could ever have dreamed of in my life…
The first thing on my mind -> Are your dreams big enough?
Great thoughts guys!
I just had a great evening with a few old friends that I hadn’t seen for years. And with them we had a really interesting chat about topics related to this: the topic was, modestly, the true meaning of happiness.
The key point that kept popping up was that happiness is more than anything about living this moment, not living in the future or the past. But while I think this is true, it’s also something that is a bit hard for me to digest.
Some random thoughts related to this and the things discussed so far:
1) Living in the past thinking that everything used to be so much better in the old times –> BAD, because there is nothing you can do to get back to live those old times again.
3) Just living today –> GOOD. Enjoying the things you are doing today, finding beauty in your current work, seeing the good things in your life is what makes your life happy. But I find it hard to accept that your life would be perfect in this state of stability. I think there should be goals in life, and that’s why the next option is my current favorite…
2) Living in the future –> BAD, because this means that you’re just thinking about the things you want in the future and forgetting what you have today. Which means you’ll never be happy. (This also reminds me of “the secret” which I think is total crap… But I won’t get started about that this time
4) Living today, but with goals/dreams –> GREAT. You should have goals and dreams that you’re working towards, but your happiness shouldn’t be measured by what you see in a distant future. You should find true happiness in your current life. In other words, this would be the love what you do part. Option (3) would be all about love what you do, but this option that I prefer is a combination of that and some “do what you love”.
And finally when you reach the state where it’s more of do what you love than love what you do, things start getting only better.
I am not sure that I agree with all of this. Many people allow their work to define themselves. Why? I go to work, work my hours, can passionately argue for what I am working on - and honestly say that I love what I do - then walk away at the end of the day. My work doesn’t define me. It is merely a part of me. It is a part that enables me to explore and develop the other aspects that I believe are equally if not more important. And these aspects have nothing to do with my daily job.
Strangely, I think that work as a life defining activity severely limits what a person can do. Yes - I am an engineer. Yes, I work in the communications field. But does that define the entirety of who I am? No. It is an aspect that I leave behind at the end of the day.
I enjoy what I do for a living. I have to. Like most people in the Silicon Valley, I work very long hours - and god forbid that I hated my job. But at the end of the day, I do not define myself as a communications engineer.
Many people who work long hours believe that they must define themselves by their job. Why? What is there to gain by this? More importantly, is it healthy? If I can’t leave work at work, what does this do to me as a person?
Happiness if very complicated, and different for everybody. Jarrko mentioned that you should do what you loved. Most of what anyone does on a daily basis is not what *anyone* loves. The end goal may be something you love, but work is just that - work. I believe that is something your should take pride in, but not what you should define you as an individual.
So those of you who think you should do what you love - do you mean that for employment, or as a hobby? Because I think many people get confused by this. And those people who can not separate work from life have trouble ever leaving work behind. Is that how you want to be defined?
I just read a great post a few days ago. In this post the blogger was wondering why we always ask each new people we meet the same question: “What do you do?” - meaning “How do you earn your money?”
For some weird reason we want to define each other by the line of work they are in.
Here’s the link: http://mindpetals.com/blog/2007/11/what-do-you-do-re-how-do-you-make-money-and-how-much-tell-me/
It sounds like you have a healthy relationship with work Jennifer. That’s good to hear, and it’s definitely not the intention to let work define you. But we spend to much time working in our lives, to not like what we do.
If we have a hobby and we don’t like it anymore, we just stop doing it and find something else. If we have a job and we don’t like it (anymore), a lot of people complain and finally accept it, because they can’t afford not to work. Part of my quest is to wake up those people and show them there are ample other possibilities.
Well put, Lodewijkvdb!
I don’t want to be defined by work/profession either. But the funny thing is that pretty much everyone new we meet always at least on some level defines up by that anyway.
For example yesterday when I met my old friends, pretty much the first thing that everyone was asking each other was “So, what do you do?”
So, no matter if we want or not, others are going to define us by what we do. And sadly enough, for most of us, that definition isn’t that accurate.
In fact I would go as far as to say that in that group of six people, only one was defined correctly by the “what do you do” question. Why? Because he was the one who was doing what he loves.
What I get from this is that if I want people to easily / quickly see who I am, I should be doing what I love. Because otherwise people will assume that I love what I do, and define me based on that.
If I’m a programmer, but see myself primarily as one, I’m in fact giving people the wrong impression about myself. What do you think?
I have a story that I think several of you will find amusing given the topic. I quit my job four years ago due to burnout. I then hauled myself down to South America for three months to get my head back. During this time, my response to the “what do you do?” question was “Professional Bum.” I actually received better feedback from that response then I ever do with the typical mini-resume. And the new “job title” was received by a wider group of people than I would have expected. Not only did this open doors with people who could barely make a living, I was envied by the people who were vacationing away from their high powered jobs.
I will still use the Professional Bum title at times. I haven’t yet convinced work to let me put it on my business cards. But I’m getting there.
I think Shane should comment on what I am about to say. I think he could build upon it.
I want to look outside of the Silicon Valley. I am assuming most of us work within the world that statement defines. I know many people from other countries who will go to work simply to work. They don’t necessarily hate what they do, but they don’t necessarily love it either. When you are talking to these people, you may or may not speak about what you do for a living. I have backpacked with travelers from many countries, and have never know what they do for a living - because that isn’t what any of us consider important.
I think the concept of doing what you love evolved - to some degree - from the Silicon Valley mindset. Look at the number of hours that anyone in this area pretty much expects to work. That makes it very hard to separate your work from whom you are.
Most of us are relatively ambitious as well. We WANT to have fun, and work on the things that really interest us. But could we stay motivated, work our hours and go home to our “lives” if we spent 12 hours a day doing something we don’t like? Would you have any energy at the end of the day to even think of anything else in that kind of environment? I don’t think so.
I believe this has led to the mindset - which is relatively new - of doing what you love. This provides you with a good infrastructure within our environment from which you can build your life.
Jarrko is a programmer. But that isn’t who he is. What people like about him is that he is enjoying his life, instead of submitting to the “grind” which many people in our area have. Next time that you are at a party, try introducing yourself as a professional bum!
You people are awesome and I am so stoked that you have come to the blog to argue on the philosophy of life and entrepreneurship. Arune, Jarkko, Lodewijk & Jen. You have my sincere gratitude and excitement.
I’ve been thinking through my last discussion with Jen over prime rib (she is pretty much a sister by proxy - if only it was genetic & I got her brains - but I guess she needs hers).
Is the impact of your work on your life different for an employed technician than an entrepreneur? Should it be?
To put the discussion into context: Jennifer & I are both passionate travelers. When I tried to explain to her how much of myself I have invested in our company, the fact that I feel like I imagine many parents do towards their children, she asked me an interesting question.
“When you travel, do you take your work with you?”
Of course! There is a small part of me that wants to make sure it doesn’t go boom. Fundamentally though, I am totally curious about whats going on, whats new, how everyone is doing. I not only love our business, I am currently in love with it (that part can come and go).
Why I love it?
I am deeply tied to act of creation. I wonder if this is possibly a male thing. Denied the ability to birth ourselves we develop a deep passion for the things we create with our hands and out mind. I know some women who are like this, but almost every man I know has this small obsession.
It satisfies personal needs for challenge, providing for my family (a much bigger thing than many people realize), having influence, improving peoples lives, being creative, being structured, being flexible.
So why is it important that I love it?
I spend a lot of time running this beast of a business. More than I ever have in the past. 4 Years ago, when I was solo, I didn’t work half this much. I billed an average of 4-5 hours per day, spent 1-2 doing non-billable, and another 1-2 in personal growth activities. I would say that I worked less than most people I knew, made more and had more fun. So why did I up it? Because for me, my personal definition of success isn’t just getting by all alone. I’m not kidding when I say that I get teary every time I think about the number of families we support.
Jen refers to our current work/life style. The fact that is you work 14hrs per day, you had better fucking love what you do. Hard to argue with that. That begets the whole priorities debate. Family, friends, fitness, finance, faith.
Entrepreneur Vs Job
I do meet employees who talk about “their” company. And some really consider it that way. Sure you might own stock, but rarely is there the deep emotional investment of birthing (please call me wrong if I am). After all, most people I know rarely stay longer than 2-4 years.
I the captain. Last guy off the ship. This is my baby and if you ask me who I am or what I do, my company is an overwhelming part of how I define myself. It’s up there: husband, father, surfer, student, writer & entrepreneur.
You see, I’ve been thinking a lot about my personal mission statement in life (now there is a challenge) and have concluded, “Create” is going to be in there. And my business is an extension of that.
Professional bum I have been … professional student I will always be.
I don’t feel like I have answered anything at all. =) sometimes it just flows that way. But you got 2 shillings and I’ll bring another pocketfull of words with me next time.
good night and good life
@Lodewijk >
…if shoveling shit got me everything I could ever have dreamed of in my life…
The first thing on my mind -> Are your dreams big enough?
How do you judge if your dreams are sufficient? I ask myself that all the time.
Just to throw in a bit of perspective:
My 2008 Goals
My Dreams
I have noticed that my list of dreams changes over time. I grow older, my experience changes and my sense of values morphs based upon the life I am living. After all, if asked me about my dreams when I was 13, it would have included some things that no longer interest me.
The interesting issue in the whole do what you love debate is, can you love something that is not taking you towards what you want out of your life?
After all, if I have a set of dreams for my life that define my sense of success and happiness, and shoveling shit is the most sure vehicle to get me there I’m sure I would love it. But in the course of time, should my dreams shift, I could suddenly find shoveling shit a very unpleasant place to be. Not because of the act, but the feeling of frustration that comes form knowing that I am working hard to run around a tree and end up in the wrong place. Just thinking about your description of your experience with your job.
What a fantastic time we live in.
Imagine 20,000 years ago. Thog asks Brok, “Brok, do you love what you do or do you do what you love?”
Maybe Brok would reply, “What, you mean floging antelope and starting fires? I was made to do this, i love what i do and i do what i love.”
(the next day Brok dies at age 16 from an infection.)
I wonder what percentage of people in the history of the world loved what they did with most of their time?
We now have the blessing and curse of choices and conveniences.
On a totally separate point, I think there is an element of character to be concidered here too. I tend to enjoy most things. There are few tasks i’ve had to do in life that i can’t find some level of enjoyment. The tasks that i have not enjoyed have been disagreeable mainly because I told myself, “this is going to suck”.
I tend to not like washing dishes, but once i’m doing it, i can enjoy it. i tend to not like tax prep, but once i’m doing it, i can enjoy it. It’s all attitude. I know people who are miserable all the time.
I’m not really into shit, but for the sake of discussion…
…if shoveling shit got me everything I could ever have dreamed of in my life…
nevermind what i dreamed in life…. If I have a pasion to enjoy life, to consider it sacred, then maybe I can find joy in shoveling shit.
I believe I differ from Shane on this and it makes for a good symbiosis. I help him to enjoy and make the most out of shoveling shit, and he helps me to move ahead from the position of shoveling shit.
Oh and Jarkko, this article kicks butt. Short, sweet, inspiring, and engaging.
Loving all the dialogue!
-p
I am probably similar to Peter in many respects, and agree with his analysis — especially the observation on this wonderful luxury of time and choice! I doubt that even a couple of generations ago people thought this much about doing what they loved. A lot of them just do/did what they have/had to!
All that said — I have been pondering this topic and think that I really fit more into the “doing what I love” camp — after all, I gave up a career that many would see as more “serious” or “worthwhile” than web design. I worked in Politics — wrote speeches, wrote policy, did all that stuff. I loved it at one point, but it never really defined me. I am still political and brany and can still write legal documents if I have to, but my work never defined who I was even though I found it fulfilling…. because I was more than that; a mother, a creator, a musician, etc.
However now, as a designer and business owner, I certainly feel less at odds with who I am and what I do. So now, I can say that I probably AM defined by my work, because everything that I am today has been a result of various experiences. I have given up a secure and successful future for a much less secure (and potentially less successful, but I hope not! lol). But thats the entrepeneurial mindset in a sense, because it becomes less about what you do on a daily basis to earn a crust, and more about how you live your life and how you approach work, money, family and all the other aspects of your life, and package it into one business.
@Jennifer: Inspired by you presenting yourself as a professional bum, I wrote a post on my own blog: http://jarkkolaine.com/2007/11/25/why-most-business-cards-dont-mean-a-thing/
When I have my new business cards, and we happen to meet some day, I will be able to hand you a card that says “professional bum”
Well, it looks like I’ve been under a freaking rock for days. Normally I come back and check comments - y’all have quite the thread going on over here.
My 2 cents - I’m with Peter. We are indeed very, very blessed. I also agree that there’s another side to the blessing coin and that is gut-wrenching indecision.
My mother-in-law tells the story that when she was in the career choice stage of life, she had four options - nurse, secretary, teacher, housewife. Sometimes, while I feel phenomenally lucky that I live in this era, I mourn for parts of the old one. Nobody has yet written a book, or filmed a documentary, or started a blog about our influx of choices and how it’s not always a good thing. (Maybe they have - if you know of any, let me know.)
One of the problems I experienced for nearly ten years was indecision. Had I been around back then, I could’ve made my choices by process of elimination. Can’t stand the sight of blood, can’t stand other people’s children, can’t cook my way out of a wet paper bag… Ding! Ding! Ding! Congratulations, Naomi, you are a secretary.
Nowadays it seems like we’re still trying to make our decisions using that old model - “Well, I’d like to be a social worker, but it doesn’t pay enough. I wouldn’t mind being a lawyer, but it’s too much school.” We go through a pre-existing list in our very narrow minds and when we get the end we settle on something and wonder why we’re not happy.
Wicked comment thread, guys. Way to go Jarkko et al.
Hi Naomi - I was just speaking to my mother about having too many options thing. I remember my finance prof bringing up the term “option anxiety” back in 1997. Simply put the more options we have the more anxiety we have. By choosing one option we always wonder ‘what if I chose the other equally as viable option?’
My parents were arranged so the choice of spouse was pretty much made for them (much to my mother’s dismay…now they are divorced). My mother’s career (fortunately she lived in another country where in many cases women were allowed to pursue careers other than nurse, secretary, teacher, and housewife) was pretty much directed by her father. Even where she went to school, etc. Makes life much easier not having options but it also makes it much more stifling.
The career options I face right now are a) pursue growing my company with reckless abandon, b) let my company sort of exist but take a job elsewhere, c) close down the company and take a job elsewhere. There are pros and cons with each of them and right now option a) is what I think (um, yeah) I’ll be pursuing.
Wow, there’s a lot to respond to! I love this thread.
I think a lot of it comes down to accepting responsibility for your own life and the results you get. When we ask ourselves whether the impact of work on our lives is different when being a technician or entrepreneur (Shane #14), I say yes! You take on a huge responsibility when starting your own business, especially when you hire other people. That’s bound to have an impact on all aspects of life, it will never be completely of your mind, like Shane describes.
We are blessed Peter, we have that possibility of choice (accompanied by indecision). But the fact that people did not have that in the past, can hardly be a reason to stop questioning these important questions.
If you are not given a choice, you can respond in two ways: accept it or fight it. And for sure, a lot of people sought the fight in the past, with stressed relationships with their parents and siblings as a result. What I hear a lot are stories about just that, fighting to get choice, the trauma to relationships, and a life dominant theme of mending those pieces. I doubt we want to go back to that.
It’s a noble cause to see the beauty in every task. I don’t like cleaning as well, but I like a clean house. I don’t particularly like cooking, but I like what the process represents (me providing for my family). Reframing activities can definitely make your life brighter.
But again, if the core part of a job consists of tasks in need of reframing, you’d better find another job (if you have the option).
@Shane:
I have defined my five personal core values that are the foundation for my personal mission statement. They are what lies beneath everything I do. One of them happens to be Growth, so I doubt I’m ever done dreaming. But that’s OK, because I like the dream and the process enough to keep on going. But it can’t be detrimental for any of my other values.
How do you judge if your dreams are sufficient? I ask myself that all the time.
Important question! Unanswerable though
For a lot of people though, they cannot answer this question. It’s simply not something they have thought about. What do I want out of life? And if that’s not something you ask yourself, the only question remains: Do I love what I do? For work anyway. And that question may be too hard to answer without a vision of the future.
Oh…and I have shoveled shit in the past and it can be quite enjoyable. The rhythm of a dairy farm (we have friends with one) can be too much for people, but has a certain beauty in it’s predictability and outdoor life.
Lodewijk, I agree, that it’s important to make good choices. I just felt like the thred needed a little perspective.
Given little choice, many of us are relatively happy doing what we have to do.
Given a lot of choice, drama ensues and we continue to choose our careers until we retire.
I remember when i was a small kid and my mom asked me to clean my room. It was a total mess. I looked all around and decided i didn’t know where to start. I was paralized my the thought of choosing what to start with. So i sat there for an eternity before searching for my mom and asking for direction.
This is a great thread with many possible tangents. I noticed that a common theme here is that we all have goals. These can be framed in the context of a personal mission statement and dreams.
We are also talking about careers, life choices and happiness.
In my opinion, all of these change. They change all the time. Certain things may stay consistent for a long period of time, and I think that Lodewijk and others referred to these as core values.
Most of us have been brought up with the concept of a 5 year and 10 year plan. Many people that I find have become “lost” within their careers and/or the daily grind have lost sight of one of those plans.
Those who can’t see what should be the ever changing 5 year plan any more, are those who become lost in the grind. They think if they can just hold out, that they will eventually get the payoff they believe is looming.
Those who loose sight of the long term plan, which should change less frequently, typically can’t see past an immediate gain. They can flit between jobs so long as they can reach all these short term goals.
Part of the concept of growth, work and a balanced lifestyle has to be tied (in some part) to how you keep track of your life plans, and your willingness to change, if necessary, to meet them.
I take a vacation once a year. Usually to some other country with a different set of values/culture/life outlook. I spend a bit of time each trip looking at my life from the previous year and evaluating what I did, was I happy, what would I change and how do I move forward. This usually involves making some slight tweaks to the short term plan, while keeping an eye on the long.
How often does everyone here take some time to evaluate where they are and where they want to go? I do not own my own business. My side work of contracting is not my primary source of income. I’m curious how this effects the entrepreneur. You all seem to hold your job as more important aspect in your life than I do.
Wowser.
So I was recently an employee. I loved my work, but hated my job. I found that as much as I loved what I did, my environment really kept me from being happy.
I found that I ‘love’ to do a lot of different things. I’m a bit of nerd, so I love the development work I get to do. I love the creative side of my work. I love talking and working with people. Being a solo entity now allows me to define what I do, and who I am on a day by day (or at least project by project) basis.
I think that most people are pretty frustrated by the fact that they have to pick one thing. It took me nearly a decade to get through college because I couldn’t pick. $70,000 of debt, 2 majors and 3 minors later I’m learning that I’m the kind of person that isn’t necessarily going to thrive doing one thing.
Now, if I can find someway to develop the ‘goals’ side of things, I’ll be in great shape. I’ve got plenty o’ dreams, and lot’s of loves. Hopefully some goals will give me some focus.
AND… i actually did shovel shit for 6 months on small organic farm up in the cascades, and it was awesome.
That is interesting Reid — and you know what?
in my experience, MOST of the “successful” people I know (In terms of being happy and content with their life etc) had a hard time in college and a hard time with the stresses of choosing a vocation.
It took me 5 years to get my Undergrad degree, because at some point I decided I wanted to do:
1. Politics
2. Law
3. Journalism
4. Communications
5. Teaching
6. Business/Economics
7. Writing
8. Multimedia
9. Medicine
At which point I had cobbled together enough units to qualify for the Pol Sci/Legal Studies degree… then continued on to the Masters for some unknown reason…
So I too have a massive debt (which is not as terrible in Australia because it is repaid through the tax system at 2% per year or somesuch), but I would not trade it for all the stability and boredom in the world!
What I am saying is — embrace the fact that you find many things interesting. Don’t accept being pigeonholed by naysayers who think the”respectable” thing to do is to work for a medium income, with a house in the mortgage belt and 2.3 children. Thats not everything.
I have 2 kids, I have tried lots of different things in my young age (28) and would not take it back for anything now that I have found my niche. its a great feeling that not many people get to experience.
@ Tea B - As you suggested, I think it really all depends on how you define success. One of the things I do is write on the topic of success. You can see some of the articles I’ve co-written at: http://www.entrepremusings.com/index.php/articles/ To me it has been fascintating meeting people from all walks of life and hearing their thoughts on success.
@Reid: It’s great to hear that I’m not the only one who finds it hard to specialize in just one thing.
I keep hearing from people that if you want to be successful you need to choose what you want to do, and then perfect you in that _one_ thing. But my reaction to those comments is more like, “if that’s what success means, I don’t know if I want to be successful” than “OK, well I guess I should get back to my desk and start learning Hibernate.”
Luckily I don’t have debt because I’ve worked through my studies (and studying itself is free here in Finland). But on the other hand, I still haven’t finished my Master’s degree although I’ve been studying since the last millenium
I will, some day, but right now writing, building a business and taking care of my family seem much more interesting than writing a thesis on software development…
Let’s see how this story ends, but right now, I’m working hard figuring out if one can have a great life without specializing in just one thing.
I couldn’t decide to post this comment here or in the over nighter post. so I am putting it here.
ahh the traditional 8-8-8. Thats a good point B (see #11 in all nighter). Julie had a friend in college who was quite religious about the idea that a ballanced life had 8 hours of work -8 hours of play - 8 hours of sleep. And he stuck to his guns.
Thinking about it - I wonder how my day plays out. We’ll lets take today.
Woke up at 7am.
1. Had to hitch a ride with julie to pick up my car (.5 hours play).
2. drove home while on the phone checking in with the team (.5 h work)
3. get home, do calls and email until 10am (2 hours work)
4. take a break and read a little (being honest - 1 hour play)
5. finish QA of an app and launch (work 1.25 hours)
6. finance (.75 h work)
7. meet peter and aaron for lunch (.75 hours play)
8. sit at lulus, email a bit of sales (.25 work)
9. meeting with peter to work on some projects (est. 1.5 hrs work)
10. surfing (play 3 hours)
….
therefor so far today
sleep (bed by 11 up at 7): 8 hours - check
work: 6.25
play: 2.25 3 surfing: 5.25
looks good to me. Will have one final work burst of about 2 hours in the evening. Then time with Julie. Then bed.
Hows your balance?
Excellent post Jarkko. I completely agree with you about bringing people with you. A big reason for my entrepreneurship is also my family and it also has to do with living life to its fullest. I have two boys (ages 3 and 6). Every Wednesday (today) I get to go to my 6 year old’s class as a volunteer and basically help the teacher out. The work isn’t anything to write home about but my son absolutely loves it. Everyone gets excited when Ian’s Mom is there. Being able to do things like that are VERY important to me. I had a very well paying job as a defense contractor that I gave up last August in order to have this freedom. Sure, my work day is kind of spread out but it works for me. I am actually more productive and spend more time working at home than I did in an office setting.
In addition to being able to spend more quality time with my family, I also get to do things that are just for me. One of my weekly goals is to get enough done by Friday that I can take the day off and me and my camera can go out. I love taking pictures as you just look at things in a completely different way than you had before.
@shane - I would say my balance changes given the day. Some days I spend 10 hours working and others I spend 6. In general I think I have a pretty good balance though…at least it works for me.
I love this post. So inspiring. Sometimes we get so caught up in doing our own things, we forget to take care of the people we love. My husband and I work together and love every minute. We make a good team and share everything. It makes work so much more rewarding that way.